(OPENING THEME PLAYING)
Great work out there, Titans.
And because you were able
to save Jump City
without singing a song,
doing a silly dance,
or making me look like a fool,
I've decided
to reward you all with...
Dramatic pause.
Just say it!
A...
Get ready for it.
Pi, pi, pi, pi, pi, pi, pi,
pi, pi, pi, pi, pi, pi, pi...
Starting to lose
interest, bro.
...iii...
Do we need to call
a doctor, Robin?
He looks
like he's in the pain.
...zza!
I thought
you'd be more excited.
We have no idea
what you just said.
Oh. I'm ordering you a pizza!
Pizza.
That's right, pizza!
-Pizza!
-(LAUGHS)
-(MIMICS CLICKING GUN)
-Pizza!
Whoo!
Pizza, pizza, pizza,
pizza, pizza, pizza,
pizza, pizza, pizza!
(BOTH MIMIC GROANING)
That's more like it.
So, the toppings...
Hawaiian, Hawa... Hawaiian.
Veggies!
Groundnuts with mints!
Black olives! Yeah!
Pepperoni!
Quiet!
What I was trying to say is
I didn't have the money
for toppings.
-So it will be plain cheese.
-(ELEVATOR DINGS)
(TRIUMPHANT MUSIC PLAYING)
Ah! Unh-unh-unh!
Now, before we dig in,
I want everyone's assurance
that we will enjoy
this pizza responsibly.
What are you even
talking about, bruh?
For some reason
every time we eat pizza,
we end up fighting over it
and running around silly
and everything!
That does not sound like us!
Well, a little.
Pizza makes you all do
both goofy humor
and goofy random humor.
I don't want any of that.
Understood?
You are the overacting, Robin.
It is only the pizza.
(PLAYING BANJO MUSIC)
Yeehaw!
Woo-woo-woo-woo!
(LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY)
(SHOUTING GIBBERISH)
(ALL LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY)
Oh. No, no, no!
You're doing it!
You're running around
silly and everything!
Stop! Stop! Stop!
Look at what
you've become, Titans.
Running around silly
and everything!
You have to stop this.
Because I haven't gotten
a slice yet!
(YELLS)
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
(LAUGHS)
Awooga!
(SCREAMING MANIACALLY)
Pizza, pizza, pizza,
pizza, pizza!
(TRAIN HORN BLOWING)
Whoo, whoo, whoo!
I'm a wizard.
(SNARLS)
(DONKEY BRAYING)
(GROWLS)
(ALL GROAN)
Man, that was some good pizza!
Maybe too good.
Is it too early
for the breakfast pizza?
It's too early
and it's too late.
What does that even mean?
I don't like
what pizza is doing to us.
When I first tried
to form the Titans,
we were going to stand
for truth and justice!
Who cares
about truth and justice?
Exactly, no one!
I couldn't find anyone
to join me!
So in a moment
of desperation,
I turned to a popular
superhero team for help.
I just don't understand
why no one wants
to join my team?
I'm promising truth
and justice.
What more is there?
SUPERHERO: I know
what you're missing, dude.
Booyakasha!
He said "Booyakasha"?
That sounds
like my catch phrase.
No, Cy, yours is "Booyah."
...kasha.
(GASPS)
That is not the point
of the story!
The point is
pizza brought us together,
made us popular.
I just don't like
what it's turned us into.
But, Robin,
pizza is of great importance.
Yeah, and pizza is
the coolest food.
Look how cool it makes me!
(FUNKY MUSIC PLAYING)
(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING)
We can't give up pizza.
It's our thing.
It's just bread and cheese
in the shape of a circle.
I have no choice
but to institute...
A pizza ban.
(GASPS)
Pizza van! Yeah!
Driving in the van,
eating pizza is so good.
No, Beast Boy.
He said "pizza ban."
Oh! Like pizza guitars,
pizza drums,
even cooler!
(LAUGHS)
No.
(PRONOUNCES SLOWLY)
Ban!
Oh!
Uh, I don't know
what that means, actually.
It means no more pizza
from now on!
ALL: No!
Good pizza-free
morning, Titans.
(SCREAMS)
What is going on?
Do not worry, Robin,
it is just the mask, you see.
Look, we don't mind
truth and justice, Robin,
but we all joined this team
for the pizza.
And if we can't eat pizza here
then we'll eat with those cool
skateboarding turtle dudes.
But you're not turtles,
or mutated!
Already thought
about that, bro.
Toxic Ooze!
(SCREAMING)
(ROARING)
(MEEKLY)
Sweet!
(SPEAKING PAINFULLY)
Awesome!
(STRAINED)
Cool.
(GROANING)
Now, if you will
excuse us, Robin,
we have the new friends
to eat the pizza with.
(BEAST BOY GROANING)
(BEEPING)
I was hoping this team
was held together
by a bond stronger than pizza.
Cheese is
the strongest bond, bro.
I see that now.
If the Titans are going
to continue to stay together,
I must lift the pizza ban.
Whoa! You can lift
the pizza van?
They're so heavy!
No, we can eat pizza again.
(ALL CHEERING)
Let's make it official.
What toppings do you want?
-Mushroom.
-Pineapple.
(ALL SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)
Plain cheese it is!
(RINGING)
Hi, I'd like to make
an order for a delivery.
Uh, what do you mean?
Oh, I see.
They're out of pizza.
So? Call somewhere else.
You don't get it.
Everyone's out of pizza!
Everyone in the world!
(GASPS) How can that be?
There's only
one possible explanation.
Turtle dudes.
Gah, this is so gross!
Well, this is where the cool
pizza-eating mutants live.
How can you eat pizza
when you're surrounded
by all that is filth?
(SHUDDERS)
The filth.
Let's get this over with.
TURTLE:
What's the password, dude?
Just let us in.
Password.
Totally tubular.
Come on in!
(LOCKS UNLOCKING)
What up, Titan bros?
(GASPS)
So, this is
what happened
to the world's pizza supply.
But why?
When we told Robin
about the power of pizza,
we were just
trying to be cool,
youngish, mutated,
karate turtle dudes.
But then you guys blew up.
You wouldn't stop
ordering pizza
and there wasn't any
left for us.
You know what
we had to eat instead?
Filth?
No! Gross!
We had to eat sandwiches,
and sandwiches are not cool.
Hey, whoa!
Sandwiches are super cool.
Bottom line, broseph,
you took pizza from us,
and now, we're taking it back.
(HIGH-PITCHED)
Sorry.
Then that leaves us
one option.
Titans, go!
Guess there's only room
for one, goofy, pizza-eating,
random-humor,
superhero team, huh?
We may be goofy
with goofy random humor,
but you're forgetting
one thing.
We run around silly
and everything!
(BANJO MUSIC STARTS)
(SCREAMING GIBBERISH)
Pow, pow, pow!
(DONKEY BRAYING)
Dude, their humor
is too goofy and random.
(SCREAMS)
They won't stop running around
silly and everything.
(SCREAMS)
I was wrong, guys.
I now know truth and justice
mean nothing without pizza!
What shall we do
with the cool turtle dudes?
I've got a radical idea.
ALL: Cowabunga!
Death Toilet 3
is going to be so good!
So much death
and so many toilets!
Remember in Death Toilet 2,
when Death Toilet rode
that flaming motorcycle?
(MIMICS ENGINE REVVING)
ALL: So cool!
I have seen none
of the previous
Toilets of Death.
Will I even be allowed in?
Actually, I don't think
any of us will
be allowed in.
ALL: (CRYING) No!
Let's just go home.
Argh, it's not fair!
Who decided we can't
see a movie without an adult?
-An adult.
-Exactly!
Adults think just because
they have jobs
and a height advantage
that they can do
whatever they want.
When I'm an adult,
I'm not going to be an adult!
Oh, you think it's a choice?
When people become adults
something changes.
They stop being fun,
they start worrying
about rules,
and they all get boring jobs
working for...
-The Man.
-(THUNDER BREAKING)
Who is this "The Man?"
No one's ever seen him,
but trust me,
one day he's coming
for all of us.
Wow, thanks for bumming
us out, Raven.
Hey, we're not adults, yet!
Let's play something stupid.
Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!
How about, uh,
Random Animal Rally!
Ooh, ooh, quick, quick,
name an animal!
(SHRIEKS AND STAMMERS)
Uh. Donkey!
No, no, miniature donkey.
Yeah!
(BRAYING)
Oh! Oh, do, uh,
a cuttlefish!
Pangolin.
Give me something
harder, mama!
Lemur.
Goodness.
I'd like to request
a tiny donkey again!
One more donk
in your face!
-Horseshoe crab!
-Easy.
Ooh, ooh, that one
type of monkey with
the bright red bottom
whose name I cannot
remember right now.
They're called
red butt monkeys, Star.
(SHRIEKING)
Can I get even tinier donkeys
one more time?
This donk tiny enough for ya?
Oh, oh, um, ah...
Come on, name something.
(EXCLAIMS)
Give me
a second, man!
Man!
(GRUNTS)
(ALL GASPS)
-Beast Boy, you...
-What?
Whoa!
(LAUGHS)
I'm like a normal dude.
I didn't even know
I could do that.
I suppose a man
is a type of animal.
(LAUGHS)
You look like
somebody's lame dad.
You have the hair
everywhere but on your head.
Is this common for those
who chose the path of the dad?
You better turn back,
Beast Boy,
before you end up
with a car payment
and a loveless marriage.
(CHUCKLES)
But seriously...
Wait.
As long as Beast Boy
looks like an adult,
he can take us
to the movie!
(ALL CHEERING)
Meh, why not?
(ALL GIGGLING)
(CLEARS THROAT)
(IN ACCENT)
Ah, yes.
Hello, fellow adult.
Lovely weather
we're having, eh?
Also, gas prices, am I right?
It's so crazy.
Anyway, I'd like tickets to
your next showing of the
very mature Death Toilet 3.
One adult and four kids.
(ALL GIGGLING)
Shh-shh!
Uh, what a handful, right?
(IN NORMAL VOICE)
-It worked! Come on!
-ALL: Yeah!
(WESTERN MUSIC PLAYING)
(GRUNTS)
(SCREAMING)
(TOILET FLUSHING)
-(ALL CHEERING)
-That was awesome!
-It was the best part!
-Awesome.
I am glad the Death Toilet
was able to save his wife
from the terrorists.
And we would have missed
it all if I wasn't an adult.
Maybe being an adult
isn't so bad.
I wonder what sort
of other stuff we could
get away with,
having an adult around.
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
(ENGINE REVS)
-(TATTOO GUN BUZZING)
-(GRUNTING)
Today was amazing!
(LAUGHS)
I'm going to be
an adult forever.
We all had fun.
But you should turn
back before The Man,
whoever he is,
finds you and forces you
to get a job.
Yeah, well, maybe
a job wouldn't be so bad.
The other parts of being
an adult seem awesome.
(YAWNS)
Indeed.
But for now,
I believe it is time
for the hitting of the hay.
Tasty dreams, everyone.
Not for me.
I'm staying up all night
to do cool grown up stuff.
See you babies in the "a.m."
(SOFTLY)
Adults are the coolest.
The good morning.
Would you care to join me
in a bowl of extra sugary
marshmallow crumbles?
(SCREAMING)
Uh, no.
Too many calories.
Got to watch my weight.
(EXCLAIMS) Beast Boy,
why are you still an adult?
Ugh! Because
someone around here
has to make a living.
Oh, would you
look at the time,
I'm late for work.
The Man is going
to come down on me.
Hey, listen, why don't
you just transform back
and we'll...
No!
You listen, young man.
If you kids don't have
all your chores
done by the time
I get home from work,
consider your butts grounded!
You hear me?
It's just as I thought.
Beast Boy has gone over
to the dad side.
The Man must have gotten
to him while he was out.
Then we'd better follow him.
(BLUES MUSIC PLAYING)
CYBORG:
Look! there goes Beast Boy.
Why would the Beast Boy
find employment here?
It is the bland
and the boring.
RAVEN: Like moths to a flame,
adults are drawn
to soul crushing
office buildings.
It is the will of The Man.
Quick, before we lose him.
(BEEPS)
-(GAGS)
-(PUNCHES LANDING)
-CYBORG: Ow, watch it!
-ROBIN: What are you doing?
CYBORG: Move forward.
(RAVEN GASPS)
(ALL TALKING INDISTINCTLY)
(ALL GASPING)
ROBIN: It's like Beast Boy
is being mind-controlled.
RAVEN: Oh, he is,
by The Man.
Yes, feed me.
Market reports,
actionable items.
Push the envelope.
Grow the business.
(EVIL LAUGHTER)
We got to bust him
out of here.
As long as he's under
The Man's control,
he won't come willingly.
Perhaps if he were to be
engulfed in the flames.
Burn him to death.
I like it!
Okay, she means
get him fired.
Also a good plan.
(BEEPING)
Ugh!
Blech!
(ALARM BLARING)
Unit 052, this work
is unacceptable!
I'm afraid, I'm going
to have to fire you...
Yes, it worked.
With real fire.
I understand.
Thank you for the opportunity.
Not so fast, The Man.
Hey! What are you
kids doing here?
I'm in the middle of a very
important meeting.
Well, it's about to
be rescheduled.
Titans, go!
(GRUNTS)
This is a place
of business,
not some cool internet
skateboard cafe.
I summon the guardians
of the status quo.
(ALL YELLING)
Ugh!
How can a few teenagers fight
such a mature and fiscally
responsible foe?
By doing what teens do best!
(POP MUSIC PLAYING)
Hey, you there!
What are you doing?
(GROANS)
Are you loitering?
-Look at me when
I'm talking to you, young man.
-(VOLUME INCREASES)
Oh, my God.
She was all like, "What?"
And I'm all like, "duh"
and she was like, "duh?"
and I was like, "shuh!"
You two!
Stop with the inane
conversation of words.
You!
Stop reading that gook
and listen to me.
Don't you want to
do something with your life?
Whatever.
(ALARM BLARING)
Ugh! What is this stuff?
(GRUNTING)
(STATIC)
(DISTORTED)
Who's that?
Who's not...
(SCREAMING)
(ETHEREAL MUSIC PLAYING)
I'm free!
(LAUGHS)
And I have
my hair again!
We thought we lost you
for good, buddy.
Man, being an adult
is terrible. I'm never
going to be one again.
Speaking of the adults,
what are we supposed
to do with all of them?
We inspire their hearts
and change their lives.
Attention,
hardworking citizens.
The Man has been defeated!
You're all free to return
to your homes and families.
The time of leading
terrible, unfulfilling lives
is over!
Now, go and enjoy
the gift of life!
But, Robin, how will they
provide for their families?
Mmm-mm-mmm.
I'm just a kid,
not my problem.